Cheetahmen II: The One Kickstarter You Should Be Backing

  I'm not a fan of Kickstarter.  Without fail whenever I hear/read about the positive aspects of Kickstarter it's followed by a pitch for that person's personal project or if you're lucky his buddy's.  For every startup that sounds like it has potential or really could use the money (which you'll rarely hear about) there are dozens of laughably bad or generic ideas trying to panhandle money from anyone who wants to be trendy.  Even worse are high profile game developers asking their fans to fund their next project by openly lamenting the state of the gaming industry; the same industry that's been paying their bills for most of their adult lives.

 This phenomenon of fans throwing money at their idols solely for their legacy is commonly known as The Tim Schaffer Effect, after the titular developer's highly popular and successful Double Fine Adventure project.  What is this game about?  Noone knows.  That's a $3,000,000 idea if I ever heard one.  The fact that it's being made by Tim Schaffer is enough for some to write an E-check; it's one of those names that if you even dabble in video games you'll recognize even if you haven't played any of his work, yet he is somehow synonymous with "indie cred".  Never mind that his last few games bombed or Brutal Legend starred Jack Black, once this went viral common sense went out the window and somehow this was the one chance to "save the adventure genre".  Apparently none of the doomsayers had played Telltale's excellent Sam and Max reboot, Gemini Rue, or researched any number of real independant adventure games recently released or in development.  That would be too risky; better to back a proven name with no concept than download Decay on Live.

  One time a girl I worked with asked me if I liked "Indie Rock".  I stopped for a minute to think about that; indie rock technically means independant rock.  Anything from Horse the Band to my friends' metal band that's been broken up for so long that it has a MySpace link could be considered indie rock, as well as uncountable garbage bands that would make me leave a bar if I ever heard it.  So I asked her what she meant by "Indie Rock", and she said, "You know, like U2?"  That's when I knew she was an idiot, and if the common use of "indie" included one of the most popular and terrible bands on the face of the planet the term meant nothing.  And that is what this Kickstarter movement reminds me of.

  There's a utopian dream with Kickstarter; that we as gamers are collectively sick of big publishers holding all of the chips and now we can take the power back and stick it to them.  We're sick of being fed the same sequels and reboots year after year, and want developers to make games they want to make, not what you tell them to.  It will usher in a new golden age of gaming, right? 

   So what do the people want, and what do the developers want to make?  Let's look at some recent success stories that have been getting some press: Leisure Suit Larry, Wasteland 2, Shadowrun, Tim Schaffer's mysterious new "adventure game" (it could be Jerry Sandusky's Big   Adventure for all anyone knows)... what do these games all have in common?  First, they're coming to the PC, which is already flooded with small independant games, mods, and hacks that had no help from crowd funding.  Second, they're all either sequels, reboots, or remakes of established franchises or are banking on the familiar.  So I guess we want more of the same.  Victory? 

 Despite my outlook of the website, I backed my first project yesterday.  That project was Cheetahmen II: The Lost Levels.

  For me, this is the perfect project; it's a Kickstarter for people who hate Kickstarter.  You don't have to worry that the game isn't going to be good when it's completed; It's guaranteed to be the biggest piece of crap you've ever laid your eyes on.  This is a true cult movement amidst a sea of pretenders.  Best of all is the project's creator, Greg Pabich.  He knows he's trying to fix and release what's considered the worst NES game ever made, yet he unabashedly promotes it like the game developer equivalent of Lloyd Kaufman.  Under any other circumstance if this guy asked me for money I'd avoid eye contact and check my wallet after I passed him.

  All joking aside, to my knoweldge this is the first project looking for a release on a dead console.  I've been enjoying the recent resurgence of classic gameplay taking inspiration from the NES era.  Games like Scott Pilgrim Vs. The World, Super Meat Boy, Mega Man 9 and 10, and Cthulhu Saves the World have been great to play on modern consoles, but what if they were exclusive to or released concurrently on the original systems they were designed to emulate?  Music is still released on vinyl records, CDs, and MP3 because fans have preferences as to what they think sounds the best and listen to music in different environments.  How cool would it be to open a brand new copy of Mega Man 9 and pop it in your NES?  That's something I can stand behind. 

  Also interesting is the amount of time that has passed between the original, broken release of Cheetahmen II and this new version.  Duke Nukem Forever was a running joke because it took fifteen years to complete.  Cheetahmen II could hold some kind of record, though; it was started circa 1991 and never officially released.  If the Kickstarter is funded and the game comes out this year, that's a 21 year development cycle.  There is certainly some room for debate, but that's impressive nonetheless.

  So please help make this dream/nightmare become a reality.  If you're interested in pledging $60 or more to get the game but are worried that you don't have an NES to play this gem in, head over to http://www.lukiegames.com/.  I've been purchasing hardware and software there for some time now and they have great prices and I've never had any problems.  And that's the last plug you'll hear from someone who hates plugs.  God help you all.